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Love and Fear, part 2

Don Wyeth

Love and Fear, part 2

Columns
3 mins
November 24, 2021

In part one of this article we began to examine the differences between love and fear and their relationship to each other when pursuing a personal goal. Brad Johnson, in his work, 12 Reasons Why You Should Always Choose Love Over Fear, establishes the idea that the opposite of love is not hate but fear. Hate is a product of fear, not the absence of love.

  “If you’re trying to achieve, there will be roadblocks. I’ve had them; everybody has had them. But obstacles don’t have to stop you. If you run into a wall… [f]igure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.” Michael Jordan

It strengthens us to acknowledge that fear is a natural inclination when embarking on a new project or relationship. Johnson suggests that we should “Recognize that fear [as] an emotion felt when something huge is taking place, but that love will allow you to push through those obstacles.” Again, he offers a choice that sidesteps the mountains that have grown up from ant hills. Looking past obstacles helps us to get a clear picture of what it is we really want instead of getting caught up in the fear and dread that things will not work out.

You can fail at what you don’t want, so you might as well take a chance at doing what you love.” Jim Carrey  

Premise 8 reassures us that if we embrace fear it brings us to the false conclusion that reaching our goal is impossible. As long as we cling to this fear we remain psychologically crippled and consequently no progress will be made toward that goal. The author assures us that “… Love is the key that unlocks the cage, showing you that it’s okay to mess up, even when you’re pursuing what you love.”

Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.” Helen Keller  

The ninth principal tells us that “…[l]ove frees you to act with confidence and courage.” In other words, without love we are emotionally paralyzed by fear and unable to act. Love gives us courage and acts as the fuel for our endeavors. Fear is limiting and love is freeing.

The art of love is largely the art of persistence.” Stick with what you love long enough, and you will be able to accomplish.” Albert Ellis

Johnson makes a revealing statement that “Fear says, “I can’t be enough.” Love says, “I already am enough.” Embracing fear causes us to doubt ourselves and question our own motives. Basically, taking a path of fear causes us to deceive ourselves and breaks down our self-esteem. The basic notion here is that love reinforces your self-esteem and will lead you to a successful conclusion.

The starting point of all achievement is desire.” Napoleon Hill  

The 11th point brings us the revelation that “Love creates new opportunities out of problems.”

It is the natural way of things that our projects, no matter how well-planned, can still have kinks and bumps in them. This is a natural progression. Robert Burns said in his poem To a Mouse, “The best laid schemes o' mice an' men / Gang aft agley.” But if we embrace fear, we are likely to falsely believe we have come upon an impossible barrier. Our fear lies to us… and leads us to ‘throw in the towel’. Embracing love on the other hand helps us to see the silver lining in the worst scenarios. Desire coming from that love keeps us on the path and provides us the courage to pursue our goal to the end.

The 12th and final point is that “Love supports others and creates a more beautiful world through cohesion.” Simply put, fear creates isolation while love encourages collaboration. This can be a very empowering driver in accomplishing your goals. John C Maxwell is well spoken on this point when he says, “Teamwork makes the dream work.” As I stated in part one, remember…if you are in love, stay the course. If you're not, fall in love. The path is there if you elect to take it.


This article was orginally reported by
Don Wyeth

Passionate and intelligent columnist from Madison, WI.

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